Saturday, September 29, 2007

Venting...just a little

Ok, I have really been trying to see the good in others. I try to put myself in their shoes and walk that proverbial mile. But sometimes I realize that those stinking shoes are too small and I just have to step out of them and hurl them away from my body!

Being new to blogging, I learn some protocol every day. I know that not always will I get a return reply on a comment that I have made on someone else's blog. That's fine. I have seen the amount of comments some people are lucky enough to receive on a daily basis and answering every - single - one of them, well it's probably just not feasible. Factor in work, children, house cleaning and personal time and it's down right impossible. When I first started blogging, I got a message from dear sweet Rhoda at Southern Hospitality telling me that it's hard for her to keep up with everyone on a daily basis. BUT, she has responded to my comments and my posts quite often. So much that I thought, she doesn't give herself enough credit! It is people like Rhoda and so many many others (and you all know who you are, wink) that make me want to put those shoes on and take a walk. I find that those shoes are quite comfortable on me and in wearing them, I get to walk their paths, secret hikes and open roads.

BUT, there is one particular person who is really, really, really bugging the ever-living crap out of me. Granted she has written a few posts with 40+ comments on it. But not every day! See I check her blog every day. I even have her on my blog roll. So I know how many people she has to respond to. Well, not has to. But should! Seems that the other gals in blogland know how to return a comment. And she does return comments and compliments to other bloggers. Just Not Me. NOT ONCE!! I thought I would go back through my posts to see if her name has ever appeared. NOPE!!

And I don't know why this is bothering me so much. Because in the grand scheme of life, who cares? The fullness of my life is not determined by who does or does not leave a comment on my blog. I mean I still get giddy when I see someone has left me one. I even giggle a little. It boggles my mind that people are reading what I have to say. But it's not the driving force in my life, so to speak. But, I have left her, I don't know - a MILLION comments on her blog. You would think that once....just once she would return the favor. I mean, throw a newbie a bone for crying out loud
! I felt like the little fat girl in school getting picked last for gym.

So I decided that I wasn't going to read her blogs anymore! STOMP STOMP STOMP! I'll show her. Disrespect me like that? Who do you think you are? I'll take your name off my blog roll. You are no longer one of the "Places I Love to Visit." I don't need ya anyway. Something about her being rubber and me being glue came to mind. But then I thought how can she be rubber when she's not saying anything. Then I thought - GOOD GOD - you really are nuts. See there's a class at the local community college that I need to take. It's called "Get Over It Already." It's taught by Professor Let It Go. But sometimes I just need a shove to get past the trivial things in life.

So, needless to say, I haven't removed her from my blog roll. I still check out her blog every day because, damn it, she's really very talented. And I still leave an occasional comment. Because I need to be the bigger person. And the funny thing is - she has NO CLUE that I'm being the bigger person. I just feel better telling myself that!


35 comments:

Ruth Welter said...

Hey Nunnie, just discovered your blog today and was reading about the rude blogger you have been upset with. That kind of thing has happened to me before, not in blogging land but in the land of internet forums. I usually end up just ignoring the person that has snubbed me after awhile. I give up..Now, I don't understand that kind of treatment either but hey,a while, I just don't bother anymore. Don't let it upset you too much.

DD2 said...

Welcome to the Internet...Let it out Hon, let it out.
You are going to feel better.

Dolly said...

Gosh I sure hope you are not venting about me! I truely never ever mean to hurt anyones feelings!
I can relate to what you are saying I sometimes feel that way too!
Like HEY WHAT ABOUT ME!!!!
But I am guilty too....
I know I don't alwways leave comments on all the blogs I read and the only reason is....my computer is slooooooooow and it takes sooooo long to leave a comment its frustrating!

I say don't sweat the small stuff! Life is too short!

I wanted to comment on the comment you left on my blog too! I am so glad someone else understands my frustrations! :-)

Hugz, Dolly

Nunnie's Attic said...

Nope, Dolly - it wasn't you.

Love,
Julie

Esther Sunday said...

Hey Julie... sorry that it has upset you. Hurtful, to be sure. To someone new at my blog, I always respond how happy I am to meet them and that I am putting them on my links so I can check back in with them. I want to let them know how much I appreciate them taking the time to visit and leave a comment Then, I do my utmost best to do that. Not because I feel that I should, but because I enjoy their creativity and want to be supportative. But, boy, as we all know, finding time is soooo tough. I would love to be able to respond to the individual comments too, but I try to use the time that I can in the best way that I feel I can give back. Hey, you are loved and appreciated! Lovies, Esther

L said...

After reading your vent I thought I would leave you with a comment...

I'm a big time lurker, not one for leaving many comments and you can probably tell that from the lack of visitors to my blog. I vent a lot on my blog about this or that and I get it that some people like the happy, cheery blogs so that's ok. I'll keep posting about whatever and you keep on posting and I'll be sure to stop in again!!!

Leigh Ann

Leigh Ann

BittersweetPunkin said...

I love you Julie!!!
Even during my "break" I had to stop in and visit you over coffee...........I'm glad I did and I know what you mean....I have ONE that never acknowledges but I glean so much from her blog/pics that it's almost a shame to delete...almost like a free magazine....you know?
BTW I am fine...just being lazy. LOL
Blessings,
Robin

Dena ~ swaddlecottage said...

OMG Julie, you are cracking me up! The little fat girl picked last in gym...and is that the theme from the Godfather I hear? You are definately one of the team captains in my book ;)

Hugs,
Dena

Bethany Hissong said...

Whew! I guess it feels good to vent... Lord knows I did that earlier this week!!! You are probably taking offense to something that is totally not meant to offend you in any way! Not everyone has time to type to everyone... I spend way too much time trying to respond to people and then I don't get anything done to show people on my blog!!! You are one of those bloggers who is always there (which is nice!) so maybe they just assume that you always will be there, like a best friend that you feel comfortable with enough that you tend to take her for granted. You'd probably be surprised how many people look forward to hearing from you regularly!!! ;) Have a good evening!!xoxo Bethany

Rhoda @ Southern Hospitality said...

Hi, Julie, I feel your pain and oh, you are too kind. I think we are all struggling with how to handle blogging time & as my blog gets more popular, it's getting harder & harder for me to welcome new people & keep up with old, so I just do the best I can. I'm glad I took the time to welcome you, as I try to do with everyone. I do understand the frustration, cause the same thing has happened to me too..and I would guess with all of us. I tend to stop leaving comments for the most except on those blogs that I'm the most interactive with & have built a relationship with the person. Cause I just plain don't have the time to post everywhere. I'm sure you'll find a good balance & venting is OK!

Now, of course..I'm scrolling through your list trying to figure out who it might be, LOL!

xo,
Rhoda

Flea Market Queen said...

Nunnie...
I have more than a couple on my blogroll that have NEVER answered me, ever! Oh well...I don't care either. Well maybe a little, I used to but now not so much!
Priscilla

Cris said...

I hope you are not mad at me either... :-) I try to respond all my comments via e-mail and not on my blog, sometimes they are taken as spam and the person does not see the reply right away, some people have told me that. Maybe saying a prayer for this person will soothe your heart. Have a great weekend Julie! Just sent you an e-mail too. :-)

BellaColle said...

Nope, I'm the little skinny girl not picked in gym! I'M THE ONE ignored!! not you dear!!! So, don't you let it bother you... I actually have seen your name on soooo many peoples 'favorite' lists...So really, I think you just visit this person... learn from her...the good and the bad.. because you are really better that!!! Vent my dear but dont let it sour who you are. I know you wont because your bigger than that... HuGS!!

Frasypoo said...

Hi,
I know what you mean !!!
I have a dog blog and I know of two people who landed on my general opinions blog and realised that I was a Republican and have never responded to my comments or visited the dog blog so i cut them out(after visiting for 6 months).

Counting Your Blessings said...

There's one that I visit too and often wonder why she doesn't ever reply. Again, like it really matters, right?! But one day I did get an email from her saying that my comment that day was "insightful, like they are everyday". I felt like I'd gotten a visit from a movie star or something, lol! Oh, I just can't ever get over that vanity thing!! =) Blessings... Polly (p.s. thank you for such a nice comment for me yesterday)

FarmHouse Style said...

Hey Julie,
Thanks for checking in and offering encouragement. I'm glad I responded to your comment. I'd hate to get caught in the cross hairs.LOL ;)
Rhonda

Penny Carlson said...

Hi Nunnie! I am honored that you added my blog to your favorite list! I have done the same for you. I plan on visiting often and hope you find time to visit me too...
Penny

Michelle E. ~ Vintage Pastiche' said...

Hi Julie! I know I have felt exactly how you have, I know my blog is not anything award winning or extremely busy and I read every comment but many it's at work and I start to respond or take notes to what I want to say or even think I have responded to someone and realize I never did so I always try to hope that the person that hasn't responded to me perhaps does the same thing.

I'm glad I am getting to know you, I enjoy reading your blog and I enjoy the warmth of your spirituality.

BTW You are TAGGED! Check my blog for details

*muah*
Michelle

Sling said...

Wow..I thought it was about time I dropped in and said hi.
I've learned not to be offended by a lack of response,only because it can be nearly impossible to find the time..I know.
In the long run,I think everything evens out in the end.

ShabbyInTheCity said...

I'm not laughing AT you I'm laughing WITH you because there are a bunch who I have left tons of comments who have never once come back. I couldn't be that way! I'd be embarrassed! I don't understand them at all.

Super Mom said...

Hey Julie!
Crazy day yesterday with the birthday party, etc. Running late on blogs. Your vent made me giggle. Hope that's OK. Cause even when you are foot stomping you do it in such a cute way. ;-)

Have a WONDERFUL Sunday!!

Alexandra, Writing & Baking Enthusiast said...

Enjoyed visiting today. Your tale reminded me of Maya Angelou's "Momma's Encounter." Your writings are fun and provocative.
Alexandra

Sophie Honeysuckle said...

Hi Julie-that's happened to me too, and I felt just like you! Until one day I got a comment from them and it was so unexpected! I realised that maybe they were just busy! OOh I hope it wasn't me you meant either!!! Lots of us are feeling paranoid now lol!!

Back Through Time said...

I loved this blog and I can TOTALLY understand where you are coming from! I am still new to blogland and don't understand what is so great about certain people and why are some of us shunned by them. I have you on my favorite list:-) Thanks for the great post!
Michelle

rosemary said...

I know I comment on your blog, so I am quite confident it is not me....but if it is, please send me an email and let me know...yea, that's confidence all right.

Julie, I feel slighted lots of times too. I think it is because we pour so much of ourselves into our blogs, and when we visit other blogs and comment with thought it is kind of nice to be recognized. I know that there are several people that visit and don't comment because I can track them with my stat counter. Still wish they would just say HI or GTH, but they don't. I have posts in draft where I have vented and just save them and go back and update the dates and re-read them and I feel better. I think you know I love your blog.

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe said...

Is it me???
I try to make a point to visit the 'neighbors'. I respond to comments on my blog but I usually don't respond by email. I remember when I started this I thought 'a few minutes a day'.
It is more like~ 'oh, its dinner time?'

Shelly @ thePINKbarn said...

Funny funny!! Thanks for being real! (I am cracking up, girl!)

Heidi said...

A big cyber hug to you Julie! I know how you feel and think we have all been there. I call some site a part of the bloggers elite club. It seems no matter what you just don't become part of it. I know Yahoo lists that are like that too. Remember that those who click with you and like you will be there even if they don't comment every day. You will hear from them. Those that don't, are missing out on you in life. Okay now I helped you vent perhaps? LOL!

~~ Heidi ~~

Terri and Bob said...

Heavens, girl... I have had those thoughts myself. You saying them made me feel less like the loser I can be sometimes! Not that you are a loser for saying them... heavens, you know what I mean, I hope!

You have 29 comments on your post right now! Woo Hoo!

Emilie said...

This chick sounds mean! If you have time to post a blog, you have time to comment on other people's blogs. She needs to get over herself. I don't think I'd waste my time reading her blog, or leaving comments.
I've had the same thing happen to me.
You get a lof of comments, and manage to comment back. You always leave good comments, too. No matter how "big" you blog gets, it's important to comment back. I guarantee she's going to lose a lot of readers.

Melissa @ The Inspired Room said...

OH MY GOSH, I got a couple of posts behind and when I got to this one I panicked! That is my fear, of letting people down! You are one of the most faithful blog commenters and you of all people should receive a kind word from everyone.

I could go on, I definitely know of people who are getting a reputation for poor blog etiquette, for copycat posts, and for a variety of other silly games. It is sickening, just like junior high. What I do is I just leave it to God. Although they make you want to wring their necks, it becomes clear after awhile who the truly nice people are and who is just trying to boost their ego.

I do try to respond to each person, but as Rhoda says, it is hard sometimes to keep up with life AND everyone's blogs. But I think that if you blog, and you don't want a relationship, TURN OFF YOUR COMMENTS. Otherwise, you need to do your best to at least once in awhile return a kind word of appreciation.

Julie, you will find all sorts out there. Just like in school. Only difference is, this time, there are a WHOLE TON of really super nice people.

xo,
Melissa

Doe Grozs Art said...

I think I got here through Cre8Tiva's blog... but this post made me laugh. This is a whole new world. I get excited if I have 1 or 2 comments let alone 31! Yikes.
Doreen

Joy said...

Ohmigosh I hope it wasn't me!! (not saying that I am talented -lol!)

Daughter of the King said...

This can be a up and down world in blogland....
and yes..I too am one of those who doesn't always comment..working on it....
but you keep doing the right thing...and God will bless you
Deby

KJ said...

Hi Nunnie:

It looks like you have received enough encouragement.

There are things that happen to me on a daily basis that disappoint. The fact is, we keep sowing your love into people's lives and God brings it back in whatever fashion He feels we need it the most. Looking at these 34 posts, you have a treasure trove of people who care, support, and love you.

It's kind of like the driver who cuts us off, gets us livid, and goes on with his day. The driver is long gone, but he is still in control of our day as long as we harbor that anger or emotion.

You have an amazing haven here to celebrate!

KJ